Yeah... can't really think of a title... oh well. lol

Well last week, I was laid off by Target.  They said they were cutting most of their seasonal help early because business was really slow...  Yargh... -_-  *shakes fist angrily*  Oh well.  I still have one more paycheck coming, so woo.  I get it on my birthday too, so that'll be nice.

Last night was the FBCS Homecoming.  I had been planning on going... but of course, just a day or two before it I got sick... cold or sinus infection... joy...  it sounds like it was a blast too... would've been great to see everyone...

Still struggling to figure out what I should do about college... there's so much pressure to go back to Cedarville... I just don't know if I want to go back to that cornfield monestary or not...

Less than a week til I'm 20!  Woo!

Give AND Take... or at least it should be...

One of the great mysteries of life... one-sided friendships.

One person tries so hard to be involved in the life of someone they think is their friend... they truly care about them... they're that shoulder to cry on... that person to vent to... they always ask what's going on in the other person's life.  However, person number 2 takes this for granted... doesn't put forth any effort... doesn't care about their supposed friend... or at least doesn't show it...

I often find myself on the giving side of this situation... once someone becomes my friend, I try so hard to be there for them... no matter what, I care about them and would do anything for them.  I've come to realize that I often don't get that in return.  Yet I sit there, day after day, trying my hardest to be the best friend I can... but is it really worth the effort?  I've finally come to the point where I've been able to see this in my life... and I'm not gonna spend any more seconds of my life caring about ones that don't care about me.

Everyone has at least one of these friendships, I'm sure.  Everyone has been on both sides too I'm sure.  So for your sake, take a close look at each of your friendships... and ask... is it really a friendship... and not just a onesided exchange.

22 HOURS!!!

I'm sooooooo excited!!!!  In about 22 hours, I will be seeing the movie I've been eagerly awaiting all year!... HIGH SCHOOL MUSICAL 3: SENIOR YEAR!!!!!!!!  I can't wait.  I've listened to the soundtrack... and it's AMAZING!!!!  Somehow better than the last 2!!!!  AHHHH I wish it would be midnight tomorrow already!!!  lol  I've got to say, though Cloverfield is my favorite feature film, HSM and HSM2 are my favorite 2 movies overall.  I listen to the soundtracks almost everyday... sometimes multiple times a day.  lol  I will never tire of it.  I love it soooo much.  It's one of the few things that can cheer me up, and give me escape, no matter what's going on.  I dunno where I would've been w/o it this past year.  Sad, but true.  lol  Haha, I can honestly say I would not be the person I am today without High School Musical 3... and yes, that's a good thing.  haha.  But yeah!  22 hours!!!!!!!!

And for those of you that haven't seen it, but hate it by default... just give it a chance!  You never know... you might just like it... maybe that's what scares you. ;)

Finally X_X

I finally graduated from OCB yesterday!!!  Yaaaaaaay!!!!

The ceremony was pretty lame.  I'm glad no one did come to see me graduate in it.  lol

Afterwards I went bowling with the fun half of my class.  It was pretty awesome.  Kinda sad realizing I might not see some of them again.

=Bobbeh v2.0 in development=

3 Years Overdue...

So I FINALLY was able to get my temps!!!  Woooo!  I'm so glad it's finally done.  That test was so amazingly easy too.  I only missed one, and it was about a stupid bicycle thing.  XD

So tonight, my friend Mike came over one last time before he's deployed tomorrow.  Was good seeing him one more time.  We played some Halo, and then said our goodbyes.  It was hard to do.  I'm gonna miss him.

9-23-08 (self-pity free, I promise =P)

Well, glad I got that out of my system... >_>

Anyway... um...  we did our Station Day broadcast Thursday.  It went really well.  The on-air people did a great job of putting together the culmination of the project in a funny and entertaining way, and overall did very well.  On a related note, I'm still getting complements on the posters I made... woooo.  lol

Now that Station Day is done and over with... we don't have any more projects at OCB... SD was our last.  For the next 6 sessions we just sit there, maybe work on our demos... but mainly just sit there... yay for having a laptop to keep myself occupied with IM, Web, games, and movies.  hehe

I was supposed to get my temps today.  I missed school, and was supposed to go this afternoon.  I was unable to, due to some very sad and unfortunate circumstances.  My aunt was supposed to go with me and pay for them, but sadly my great-uncle, who has been dealing with cancer for quite some time, had to be admitted to Hospice.  His lungs have begun filling up with fluid.  They don't believe he will last through the week.  We still hope and pray for a miracle.  If you could do the same, that'd be much appreciated.

My friend Mike (not the one from FBCS) is about to be deployed to Egypt.  He leaves Ohio this weekend.  Didn't realize how much I was gonna miss him until I went to his graudation party, and realized that it could be the last time I see him.  I first met him when he was my cousin Brittney's boyfriend.  I actually became better friends with him after they broke up.  When they broke up he stopped being the person my cousin wanted him to be, and finally started to figure out who he actually was.  Anyway, he's leaving this weekend, so I just ask that anyone who reads this prays for his safety and success in Egypt, but also that I get to see my friend again.  I'm hoping to get to see him one more time before he leaves, so I hope that happens as well.

Well time for me to go watch some CSI: NY (5 day, All day marathon on Spike.... woo).  Til tomorrow, farewell!  No self-pity, guaranteed!  =P

Fleeting...

Each day just keeps getting worse.  I can't keep going like this.  

I am miserable.  Each day, it's the same thing... I go to school... I come home... I sit in front of my computer screen for a few hours... and then I lay in my bed for a few hours before I can actually get to sleep, which is usually around 3 am.  (Now it's even worse, because one of the legs on my bed broke because it was an extralong twin mattress on a normal twin frame... and we can't afford to by a new one anytime in the near future, so I'm stuck with a bed that slants 30 degrees on most of the right side of it.)  I stayed back home to help my mom with the bills and to keep us from losing our house and being homeless... again... and of course, I still don't have a job, and our finances are still getting worse.  I'm only finishing OCB because of the scholarships, loans, and money we have invested in it... I'm convinced that place is just a ripoff.  I don't even know if broadcasting is what I want to do with my life.  I'm sure OCB isn't going to be much of a help getting a job anyway unless it's in the middle of nowhere in Montana.  And everyday that I'm trapped in this house... it's either stay in my oven of a room in front of the computer or TV, or go downstairs, and sit there and do nothing, and eventually listen to my mom go on about "my dad and his whore" and just drive me even more crazy.  It's hard to be strong and listen to it over and over for 2 years.  I am emotionally, physically, and spiritually depleted... and I'm all alone.

The friends I do have are either too far away... are too busy to make time for me...  or just don't care.  Classmates of mine at OCB only care about drinking... that's their idea of bonding or having a good time... which means I don't have them either since I don't do that.  Yes, I do realize that there are those that I talk to that care... don't get me wrong, I am grateful for it all... but... I need more than just talking or words the internet... I need someone there next to me to say it'll be ok, or someone to just hang out with to forget my worries for a couple hours.  A shoulder to cry on.  I just need someone to let me know I'm worth their time...

I'm sure if someone does respond to this... the response will probably just be "pray about it."  Oh believe me, I have been... and it's not changing anything... so then you may say I don't mean it, or I'm not allowing things to change... and I'm sorry, but that's complete bull.  Believe me... I've been praying.  And not to step on anyone's toes, but I think some people use the response of "pray about it" as an easy way out so that they don't have to be there for their "friend"... God'll take care of it.... Well what if God's way of taking care of it is you being there for your friend?

I need a change... I need to get away... I need anything but this... and sadly... there's not a thing I can do about it...

If you took time to read this... I do greatly appreciate it... at least I'm worth a couple of minutes of your time... and that does truly mean something to me.

Another Saturday

Welp, it's Saturday once again.

And once again, I'm sitting here, bored and depressed out of my mind.

The week wasn't too bad, for it being yet another week in the place known as OCB.  I've got pretty much the easiest job on this project... I make posters and promotions in Photoshop... and then I print them out and hang them up... best job ever.  Our class has already been complimented on having the best posters ever.  Wooooo!  I might post them on here after while.

Still, I can't stand being in that place much longer.  Thank goodness I graduate, as of right now, on October 8th.  If anyone wants to come and see it, that'd be awesome.

So I'm probably just gonna do the usual today... try and find stuff to do on the computer... and then watch HSM, HSM 2, or Camp Rock... -_-

WWE Unforgiven

Unforgiven was amaaaaaaaaaaaaaaazing!!!!!

First, my friend Mike and I got there, and using our Reserved Parking Pass, which we also got for free, parked right outside the walkway from the parking garage to the arena.  We then headed to the suite.  It was AMAZING.  It was SO CLOSE to the ring!!!!  There was so much amazing free food!  Chicken, sausage, meatballs, chips, pizza..... sooo great.  And all the free Pepsi products we could drink!!

Then the rest of our classmates arrived, settled in, and ate.

The wrestling then started!

All of the matches were great.  Matt Hardy became the ECW Champion!!!! Yaaaay!  He's one of my favorites.  Sadly, my favorite wrestler, Jeff Hardy, was seconds away from winning when Triple H stole the victory, and retained his WWE Championship.  The rest of the matches were pretty awesome.  It was an unforgettable experience.

Suite Stuff

So, a few weeks ago, a classmate of mine said he could possibly get a bunch of tickets through his internship with a local TV station to the next WWE event, WWE Unforgiven, which will be at the Q on Sunday, Sept. 7th. Though I was quite excited at this news, I still had my doubts.

Well I went to see Hamlet 2 on Wednesday (possibly the funniest movie I've ever seen). I received a text from the classmate, saying he got the tickets, and that they were suite ones! WOOOOOOOOO!! Later he clarified that 4 of them were suite and the other two were club seats with suite passes. So since the club seats were closer, I took those and the suite passes.

I'm so excited!!! Something great actually happened!! I have always wanted to go to a WWE event, but never had the money. Sunday is going to be so awesome!

Blech

Well today, I'm not feeling to well. Headache... nausea... and I've been unable to sleep. Perhaps it's because of the heat. I dunno. Missed school the past 2 sessions because I felt like crap. Hopefully I'm able to graduate October 7th.

I was rather disappointed today. The High School Musical 3 contest on Myspace started today... but of course, only open to high school students.... YARGH.

Less than 52 days til HSM 3! Wooo.

Well anyway, I can't think of anything actually interesting to say... so I'm going to just go look for a snack.

Oh! And the new 90210 starts tonight! I'm gonna watch it just to see how it is. I wonder how long it will be before they fire Shannon Doherty again. haha

My Own "Getting Started Weekend"

Well, I just found out today that my Gmail account also counted as a Blogger account too... crazeh, I know. So I figured what the heck, why not make a blog on here.

So lately I've been struggling with a dilemma: Stay at OCB... or go back to Cedarville.

Well if you're reading this, I'm sure I've probably already ranted off the reasons for both options. If not, just ask me. Anyway, it had been set that I was going to Cedarville... but I was still kinda uneasy about it. Still really indecisive. Well then something came up to make my mind for me...

I found out that we've been barely able to keep up with the rent... and my mom got served with divorce papers the other day, because my so-called "father" doesn't want to pay us support anymore... he already only gives us something like 400 dollars a week... which is all we have to live on... my mom is medically unable to work. So I need to stay home... and get a job... and hopefully finish OCB somehow...

Starting yesterday was Getting Started Weekend at Cedarville. It is the weekend where everyone returns to Cedarville, gets settled into their dorms, get their classes scheduled... and see all their friends... Well I'm not there for that... But in a way... this is my own "Getting Started Weekend." I now know what to focus on, and what direction I'm kinda going in, since the ordeal of OCB vs CU is finally done. I'm gonna do my best to turn my life around... get a job... finish OCB... get in shape... get my license... and just make my life better....